Regardez mon booty

Warning - this post is not about my Beyoncé-like posterior (sorry to disappoint)

Le Tour does seem to bring out a myriad of emotions in a grown man. From the fist pumping, screaming fool that fleetingly showed on Eurosport (we stood by a distinctive tree on the Tilloy les Marchiennes section of pavé so that I would have the best chance of seeing myself on the telly - it worked!) to the tongue tied pit lane loiterer at the Wanze départ.

However, all of these characteristics pale in comparison when it comes to the tat obsessed thug that wants to claim every single piece of jetsom from the caravan. Large PMU foam hand - I NEED IT! Cheap floppy Skoda hat - GIVE IT TO ME! FdJ jersey - I BEG YOU YOUNG TEENAGE PROMOTIONS GIRL, THROW IT TO ME NOT THE 8 YEAR OLD BOY WITH ONE LEG (he'd never get the use out of it like I would). So a hearty couple days worth of leaping, pouncing, elbowing and snatching resulted in a rather large pile of tat that, when in Rome, brought me a great deal of satisfaction but, when in home, made me wonder why I have added to the growing mound of tentatively cycling related 'memorabilia' that I am amassing. And I don't even want to start on the new addiction I have to Haribo liquorice.

Here's what I got -


This constituted a nice late lunch.........


....always support les flics........


.......utterly pointless 'pop out' disks seemed all the rage this year......


.......these are the uninflated clackers that always look as if they are going to hit a sprinter full in the face at 70km/h........


.......chapeau le tat!

My mate Jonny

What a day's racing. Adieu Lance, it's time to move on. As for Andy - Schlecktastic, can we dream of yellow? Anyway, high on the altitude of it all I logged on to facebook to see if I had any friends and low and behold there was Jonny on chat (Jonny to me, Mr Bellis to you mortals). At this point I should confess that I have been trying to collect cyclists as friends and have had moderate success which I will try and tap into for future posts. Well, thinks I, no time like the present to have any impromptu bit of 'pro talk' and this is how it went (with what I was thinking in brackets -

5:01pm Me
what a stage!! au revoir Lance - but a shame about Wiggo (READ AS - 'Hello Jonny, please talk to me)

5:02pm Jonny
yep, didn't think wiggins would do anything like he did last year so no surprise there

5:03pm Me
no, but 8 minutes? to be honest he has looked miserable the whole week. Should have been a DS this year (READ AS - my God he's answered me and I need to keep this going - throw in a little pro talk like DS and he'll think I'm a pro too!)

5:04pm Jonny
yeh, oh well.. still a chance for a stage win

5:06pm Me
mmmm.....doubtful in my opinion. too many good riders and I don't think he has got the legs for the mountains anymore, unlike your team mate - classy ride (READ AS - err, I'm still talking about Lance here)

5:07pm Jonny
yes i know that.. there is always the breakaways or tt `s

5:08pm Me
we'll see . hope the next two weeks are as good as this one. hope you are continuing to get stronger too. have a good evening (READ AS - look mate , if you won't talk about Lances 'defaillance' I'm off - futurestar is getting fussy and I simply don't have the time to talk at cross purposes)

5:09pm Jonny
yep we will.. cheers (READ AS - is this the royal we?)

Anyway, hopefully we'll chat again and be on the same page but I did notice that he hasn't put anything on his blog about me - maybe next time?

(pic courtesy of bikeradar.com)

La belle de Spa

She stands 'sur la balconette' with an air of mystery. La belle de Spa what secrets do you know, what places have you seen, what fantasies do you dream? (don't answer that last one please)

Here are a few other pictures of the natives (from Spa and Wanze) for your delectation


Standing on the balcony they could see something approaching.........


...so they called the priest........


...who called the armed guard.......


...to protect them against the Gros Gourmand de Wanze.

Cav makes his mark (finally!)

Here are a few pics of the man and the machine taken before the start of the epic stage from Wanze to Arenberg. What a day, what a trip. So much to say and no time (yet) to say it. Keep checking in as things will be appearing over the next few days / weeks telling the tale and showing the evidence of another brilliant 48 hours of Le Tour.

And, whilst he may have blown his chance of green the outpouring of emotion after today's victory just goes to show that he's not complacent. Chapeau Cav!


The bike...........


the feet..........


the man.

Le jour est venu, encore

Procycling guide - check (the best - end of)

Cycling weekly - check (comparing the favourites to fish? it's simply not funny)

Eurosport installed - check (she's not happy)

Camera charged - check (I will continue to try)

Car insured - check (good boy)

Directions printed out - check (as if it will help)

Hotel in Wanze booked - check (well, about 3km outside to be truthful)

Well, in that case IT'S TOUR BABY, IT'S TOUR.

The Correspondent and I will be heading to Spa, Wanze and Arenberg to witness first hand what is possibly the most exciting ever early stages of Le Tour. As with Barcelona pics will surely flow but until then content yourselves with my little mini makeover - yellow for Contador, green for Cav, red and white for a Schleck and white for....who knows (Martin?, Fugslang?)

L'amener!

A poor workman blames his tools

As you know, a couple of Saturdays ago saw the now annual pilgrimage to Smithfield to watch the (ever improving) Nocturne. As you all know the folding bike race became yet another Hendernator procession but I do now think that the Elite race could do with stepping up a gear to attract a more international entry level rather than simply being another national level crit with the odd (HTC sponsored) guest rider.

Anyway the point of this post is that Dan joined me and my Grupetto amici to enjoy the racing and like me he packs a Canon G10 as his preferred choice of snapper. However, unlike me he knows how to use the bloody thing (a combination of skill, training and bothering reading instructions that I do not and simply never will bother doing). So behold a selection of his really rather decent pics. Another chapeau! methinks.

In the words of Lionel - 'Cos you're once, twice, three times a winner

On a blustery June evening in central London one man stood alone (outside a pub) awaiting his destiny. When the time came that man did not fail. He stood tall, ran fast and unfolded with the rapidity of a Ninja origamist. Holding steady his nerve he sat in the wheels with a beady eye trained on his prey - yet another Dahon folding bike. What was before the start a distant dream became a brilliant reality as Keith "The Hendernator' Henderson stormed to his third victory (a threePete as a certain Mr Sampras often said) in the Smithfield Nocturne Folding Bike Race with almost embarrassing ease.

Chapeau mon brave, chapeau, chapeau, chapeau!


To the victor the spoils